While other bloggers were having fun at Lady Gaga, I was sitting in a town government commission meeting. This week was crazy so it’s been a little light on the blog front. Plus, as you can guess from the first sentence, my life can be straight up boring. It’s hard to find time to eat or sleep, much less do some thing fun like read or write.
But this morning I did finally get the chance to do a bit of link clicking and went over to Miss Tavi's site to read her post discussing fashion and responding to Tanya Gold’s WhyI Hate Fashion article.
Before I launch into my thoughts about Ms. Gold’s article, I want to say that I think it’s great that I, a 37 year-old, can have an intellectual discussion with a 13 year-old. Many would relegate Tavi to a mere "child" status and discount much of what she has to say. I think that is very biased. I'm generally not a "kid person" but I am a fan of smart intellectually curious and engaged kids... just ask my amazingly smart and talented friend Miss Bridget who's been impressing the hell out of me since she was approximately 6 years old. I don't think it’s weird or surprising that Miss Tavi has an interest in and great knowledge of fashion and actually forms educated opinions about the arena. Heck, I remember at 13 I was given a list of classic books we were going to be reading in high school and college and was appalled that I hadn’t read some of them already. I then spent my summer reading most of the list. That age is the perfect time to be passionate about something and totally immerse yourself.
But back to the article and, in theory, my point for writing. I see both ladies’ perspectives here.
But I have another.
I appreciate artistry, especially in this day and age of increasingly disposable fashion. I appreciate the designer's eye and vision. I understand they have an aesthetic they are trying to achieve. I'm sure that is the rationale behind choosing the models they do. I can also see how a consumer seeing very thin girls and not seeing a range of sizes and shapes represented in ads, on the runway or even in stores can make you feel like you are pushed out of the realm of the "fashionable".
The way I have kept from being overly influenced and possibly feeling bad about myself is because I am a superficial consumer. I mentally separate the designer's fantasy from my purchasing criteria as much as I can. Tanya seems to be more ifluenced by the messaging they are sending. But what I think is great about fashion is creating your own vision with the pieces that are put out and less trying to fit into their fantasy. Sure, in my younger years I was probably more impacted body image-wise by advertising - ironically during my most effortlessly thin timespan - but I've worked to move on from that.
As I've gotten older, I just care about what I like. And while I'm not thin, I'm not outside of the range of "regular" sizes either. So while Ms. Gold feels liberated by no longer fitting in with fashion and therefore having an "outsider's" perspective on what she feels is the absurdity and dangers of the fashion industry, I'm still sort of in it. But what surprises me is why she lets it get to her. I've always tried to subscribe to the Eleanor Roosevelt saying: No one can make you feel inferior without your consent and WendyB’s: Wear what you want. Tanya should, especially as a 36 year old, be able to enjoy what she wears and not feel like she has to be or act a certain way because of a marketing campaign. Maybe that is a difficult task for her and many others.
It's not like I don't have body issues and self-conscious doubts like anyone else. But I try not to let that hold me back. I've never been easily influenced by outside pressures. I don't buy things because others are or becase they're in style or because of a devotion to a designer or brand. I only buy what I like. I just want what I want. I've said it before but it bears repeating- I don't care about a pedigree, if I like it, I like it. End of story. Maybe I've always been more self-confident and strong-willed than others. Heck, you could even call me cocky rather than the kinder "self- assured". And that great for me, right? Is it being to simplistic to say that everyone can feel this way? Do I have too high of expectations of people and expect others to be as strong willed as I am. Is that unfair?
But I have faith in people. I don't think you HAVE to feel bad about yourself, no matter what the ads and society norms say. You can be whoever and however you are and still have fun with your clothes. Yes, you can get mad and be frustrated when you see something you like or want and you can't get it. That sucks, believe me, I've been there. But when that happens, don't get mad at yourself or your body shape. Get mad at the companies ... And let them know! I can't tell you how many times I've called and bitched at a company for not making my size. You can do it too. Don't just sit there moping that fashion hates you and women and is nothing but something that makes us all miserable. Fashion is, at least for me, just fun. That's probably why I have a schizophrenic eclectic all-over-the-damn-place wardrobe. One day I'm in a vintage-inspired lady who lunches look and the next I'm in black sequins, bones and knee-high combat boots. I'm enjoying it, even if I get some crazy looks.
I am energized and inspired by my blogger friends. Them much more so than any industry type. Editors and models that have access to everything do little to impress me with their so called "style". Individuals creating unique personality-filled looks with pieces thrifted, vintage and from regular stores are much more inspiring.
If you enjoy who you are, you can enjoy clothes and accessories too.
Last year I made a pretty substantial set of goals for myself. Because these are a list of goals and not resolutions, many of them will transfer over into this year, and some years to follow. And that's okay because they are about progress and moving forward, not just checking items off of a list.
But I do think this year is going to have a different feel. Maybe it is the closing end of a decade. I'm not sure. 2009 really was a year of change a year to accomplish and strive. I feel that 2010 is going to be all about focus. Focusing internally and externally. So many things were created - connections, experience, work, that now it seems like a time to reflect and refine and find the right directions in which to grow.
Personally I want it to be a year filled with more experiences. We traveled more this year and I want that to continue. I want to regroup and decide on which path I want to follow. I have some very personal goals that I need to work on. And I need to work on creating more of a balance in my life between self, work, online, town and home. Having so many outlets can often be draining which makes me rebel by not accomplishing the things I want to accomplish. So by pulling back in some areas I hope to be more efficient and impactful.
How are your goals or resolutions formed? Do you feel the need to take stock at the beginning of the year or is this an ongoing process. I'd love to learn more about your plans and how you integrate change into your life.
I have a dream. I want to cozy up in front of the fire. Ideally with the pups, a book or a good movie and snuggly cup of hot cocoa. I live in a house with two fireplaces, yet sadly I still haven't realized this vision. Why? Our house is 110 years old and the fireplaces are unlined.
What this means is we have really old mortar which could have cracks and crevices in it. Fire sparks + 110 year old wood is not a good thing. So we need to have them lined. But the pitch of the roof is very steep and requires scaffolding to be erected, so it would be a pretty costly process. We've looked into converting the fireplaces to gas but the house (built oh so long ago) is not to "code" so we would have to cut up the original mantels to do this. Something we are loathe to do.
We also need to get one of the chimney's capped. Right now it is open at the top and chimney swifts (small birds) nest in there in the Summer and cannot be disturbed, so we need to cap the chimney in the Winter in anticipation of working on the lining in the Summer. It's a process.
So to make this vision a reality we need to save up. I'm hoping this is the year we can do at least one of them, so that by next Winter, the pups can sleep in front the fire for the first time.
Although this does not seem to be the type of day I need to actively plan for or mindfully enjoy, a lazy day around the house seems as elusive as a more "exotic" event filled or travel-requiring day.
When I'm at home I always feel there are chores to do, or work to catch up on or sites to read. I rarely sit down on the couch with a kitty on my lap and read, much to my dismay. I love to read. I have a library. I need to push away the distractions and immerse myself in a book. Although I do take naps, I need push away the guilt and turn of the noise (aka the computer and the TV) and be silent and still. I do a lot of that over the holidays but what better time than late summer, when its too hot to be outside running around doing errands.
I am a believer in the power of intention. I believe that writing things down makes them happen. This is either a subconscious manifestation or, in some cases, a magical one. But I’ve seen in time and time again in my own life so that I can’t discount it.
Each year I take off the last two weeks of the year. I have been doing this for over 12 years now. While many people spend their vacation time in the Spring or Summer, I prefer the Winter. It is a time when my job can often be quieter and I find that when other people are distracted by the holidays, I have more freedom to concentrate on things I want to do just for me. I try to work on personal to dos, relax, read and spend time with the pets.
I have a ritual of reading, right around mid-November, How to Simplify your Christmas. The book itself isn’t that great or innovative but it reminds me of the intentions that I have for myself during this period. What I like to at the end of the year, along with buying a new weekly desk calendar and filling in all the birthdays and events I need to keep and eye on next year, I write out a list of goals. I don’t do resolutions but I do list things I want to accomplish personally or around the house or trips I want to take. Last year I took it a step further and broke it down into categories. It is amazing how many of them are checked off at the end of the year in one way or the other.
The great thing about making goals is some of them can be used as building blocks for longer term (and I’m talking 5 – 10 year) accomplishments, so it’s not always a horrible thing if they aren’t completed when December 31st rolls around. The goals list is also useful to see where I need to focus better in the next year; where did I get lazy or skimp on myself. I haven’t done a thorough review of my 2009 list yet, so I can’t give a report out, but I’ll give myself a B against my 2009 list.
One thing I want to add to this end of the year ritual is what I am calling Days of Intention. I read a comment pointing out that starting today (December 20th) there are 12 days left in the year. A power number. How impactful would it be to envision a list of 12 days during the upcoming year that could become truly amazing touchstones? By envisioning these days you will create memorable, potentially pivotal, events in the future.
I think you could be very over the rainbow with these envisioned days. Putting it out there to the universe that you are open to magical events. And I think that is important too. But I’m going to use most of my days to create scenarios that are simpler and totally under my control. Things that I can either make happen or just be mindful and aware of when they are happening so I can guide them and imprint them into my memory banks, similar to cognitive dreaming.
So, look forward to the series, one for each of the 12 days, and I hope you will share some of your days as well.
It has been a busy busy week. Coming back from Vegas I had to plunge right back into work and my campaign! Yep, I'm running for town office so I have to be all political.
Don't believe me? Here I am getting grilled in "candidate forum". I hope you can pick me out.
To look all trustworthy and candidate-y I wore a black cami, pencil skirt and tights, my dependable Aerosoles buckle shoes, paired up with my favorite JCrew Astrid jacket in bright blue.
On Wedneday I finally got to wear my new vintage band jacket. I know I'm late to the band/military jackets trend but I'm picky and this was the first one that really met my criteria with fit, color, embellishments and cost. So, yeah, I love it.
The style of this jacket is open so I wore a cami underneath.
Worn with new toothpick jeans from JCrew (which I think I need a size down) and my Ann D. boots.
I will be wearing these boots forever. I just can't get over them.
Yesterday I had a client meeting so I was back to jacket and skirt
I've been wanting a velvet jacket (still looking for a green one!) and loved the soft grey color of this one from JCrew. It from this season if you like it and it comes in other pretty colors.
I'm all about pencil skirts now. I used to love a-lines and wore them all the time but the pencil shape is so flattering and versitile. This purple tweed one just came from Target.
The jacket was such a soft snuggly grey I knew my equally soft and delicate Head over Heels bird pumps.
It's been a busy week. Today I'm wearing brown and orange and looking 1970s... images soon!
What do you think? Liking the more outfit images? I'm trying to be better about taking pics.
I'm out here at BlogWorld in Las Vegas this week. It's been kind of a crazy last few weeks between Fashion Week, then some work projects, the hubby traveling too and getting a new pup. Traveling again for the BlogWorld New Media Expo kind of crept up on me and I left my packing planning to the last minute.
As I was making up a list (because I always have to make a packing list), I realized I was packing for a persona.
When you get up for the day or plan outfits for a trip what are all of the things you take into account as you go. For me, it's a whole variety of elements from the weather, to something in particular I want to wear, if I'm walking a far distance or not and even the environment I will be in. Of course you want to have a level of appropriateness that you take into account so you can feel comfortable physically and emotionally happy and confident.
But do you ever feel you are dressing for a particular "side" of your personality too?
My wardrobe barriers are not very static. I feel pretty comfortable wearing most of my clothes to the office, depending on what day it is. I do tend to buy or plan outfits with different perfect scenarios in mind but I usually like my clothes and accessories so much I don't want to tuck them away to wait for some "perfect" situation. If I did that I wouldn't be able to wear most of my stuff!
But I do notice that I think of some outfits as projecting more of certain elements of my personality. For example, this would be a pretty typical work outfit -
A comfortable fun dress that's not to revealing with cute quirky element like the Pretty Good Things deer headband. This still reflects my personality but not too shocking, in case I get called to a new business meeting.
For Fashion Week, I packed with quite a bit of planning and care. I wanted variety and layering and fun prints and a few signature stand-out items. I wanted to look good when meeting some of the other stylish ladies that I know from online but still be able to walk around all day to the tents. There were pieces that could be mixed and matched to extend what I packed but what I brought were pretty much planned out looks.
As I packed for Vegas, a whole different set of outfits came into play. Not only was this going to be 3 days of attending conferences and speakers but there would probably be a great deal of walking with a few after hours networking-type events. It was also in a city where people dress a lot more "comfortably", especially the majority of the folks attending the expo.
I was more what I would jokingly call "hipster". By this I mean more denim, graphic tees, lots almost exclusively black pieces... oh yeah, and sequin Converse.
I did bring my sequin F21 jacket and Skovgaard heels to have an edgier outfit for night but during the day I'm wearing black ballet flats. And my best accessories? My iPhone, chargers and Vivienne Tam HP mini (which is the BEST THING EVER for traveling).
I actually find I need to be careful when planning for packing this way. I tend to get a bit unrealistic at times because I imaging all sorts of events and situations that I would need to dress for, then I WAY over pack because I end up not doing about 75% of what I imagine could happen. Hey, I could need to have a dress for tea with royalty when I go to London next time, right???
Do you dress and pack practically or is all about who you want to be that day?
This is back when Target and the Go International collections were something to be excited about.
I love love love the Luella jacket. I am so glad I bought it a million years ago.
It is so much more vibrant in person.
I usually like to wear this with a bright blue shoe to pick up the smallest stripe color but today I really wanted to wear these Jimmy Choo Violin heels (purchased maybe, I don't know, 7 years ago). A jacket and jeans are one of my best pairings, especially my favorite Gap Long & Leans - because I am neither long or lean.
I remember these shoes being totally TOTALLY knocked off my Steven Madden and getting so pissed.
Not sure if his had the cute little extra strap that came off the sides, though.
I haven't fallen in love with many Choos lately. I used to love them the most but they've changed their style to be really, I don't know... trendy I guess. They used to be unique and sexy but now I feel blase about most of them.
I am interested in seeing how the H&M pairing turns out. I like a few from the collection but we'll see how they look in person.
Michelle is a "fashion blogger, freelance seamstress, lover of shoes. And cats!" She has a fabulous site - Decline Designs - and great vintage on Market Publique too.
But don't just listen to me, let's hear from her!
* I really like bright colors, as you may have noticed!
* I love shoes, like any reasonable person. My current favorite brand is Fluevog.
* I'm frequently interrupted to be informed that I talk too fast.
* I'm also frequently told that I'm long-winded. The book I wrote to enter into the Young Authors competition in 3rd grade was longer than all of my classmates' books combined.
* I am a ridiculous softie for animals. We have two cats that we rescued from being strays, and I want a dog too! I grew up in a house out in the country, where we had a lot of animals from a very young age. I've decided that when my husband and I get old and retire, we're going to rescue and foster animals.
* I had a mohawk at one point, and sometimes miss it, only to remember what a pain it was to put it up in the mornings.
* I've been a vegetarian since the age of 12-13, which was no picnic in the small, conservative town I grew up in!
* I'm a bit of a compulsive worrier, although I've got much better about it over the last six months.
* I am a huge, huge Buffy geek. As in, I own all 7 seasons on DVD plus all of the trade paperbacks of the season 8 comic, to date. (the aforementioned cats are named Wesley and Giles, despite Wesley being a female. We found her when she was too young to tell!)
* It's not a commonly known fact, but I love Teenage Mutant Nina Turtles. In fact, I have photographic evidence of my love from an early age.
* I am super, super proud and glad to have the mother and grandmother that I do; they are both total badasses and worked really hard to get where they are today. My grandmother was the one who instilled a feminist ethos in my mom, who in turn instilled it in me (even when I was young and naive and reacted by rolling my eyes and saying "Oh mom, we don't need feminism any more!" *cringe*). I love them both to death.
Thank you, Poochie, for asking me to be a Sparkler! I love your blog and have deep envy for your shoe collection :)
xoxo Michelle
Thank YOU, Michelle for being a Sparkler! Everyone, go chat her up!
Okay... who's next?!? Come on, Sparkler, Spill it!
Here is just a taste of some of the things I'm going to be posting for Sale.
Let me know if you are interested!
UPDATED:
I have taken these off of Flickr so I don't violate the ToS (oops!) so if you saw something while they were up, just email me for pics. I will post a dedicated page soon with all this pics again.
I have this bad habit of buying stuff because it is lovely or because I'm trying to work outside my comfort zone or I'm just totally acquisitive. Because of this major flaw I am often left with a whole bunch of things I love but have never even worn.
Then there are those fabulous items that I've only worn a few times but I really just need to make room for more new fabulous things. And as I tend to baby my stuff, it's all in really really great, if not pristine, shape.
What does all this mean???
It means I have great things to sell. I'm going to start with selling the clothes of all sizes and some accessories directly through this site. I will be posting them here shortly. Payment can be done via PayPal which I will provide or a check but for the latter, check will need to clear before shipping. Prices will be before shipping.
A few of the vintage pieces will go on Market Publique and the shoes and some of the more housewares type things will be on eBay. Since my shoe size is pretty small I thought it needed a broader reach.
What the hell happened to me? This may take a while so grab a seat.
That last you hear from me was Tuesday and I tell you that I got my Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week creds and that I'm going. I'm going for 6 nights/7 days and then you don't hear from me again except for sporadic Twitter messages that I'm there.
That is very bad blogger behavior from me and against the whole point, right???
Well, I actually came home early. Instead of staying until Tuesday morning I flew back Saturday. Why on earth would I do that, especially when I love going to New York, I have lots of friends who live there and would be in town, there are a million things going on, not the least of which is Fashion Week and all the related events?
There were a number of reasons. A major reason was I had some work issues that needed to be attended to. I felt that I was not being effective in taking care of those and I was not maximizing my time in NY. I was distracted and probably distracting. Almost the whole day on Friday I was in my hotel room and not out and about. It was a little emotionally draining trying to do both and I got to a point where felt it would make more sense mentally and financially to come back home on Saturday.
I also have to explain the type of person I am. I am NOT good at the short-range, spontaneous plan. I am the type of long range planner where I think about things I might possibly need for a trip nine months away that I haven't even booked yet. Deciding on Sunday night that I was going to go on a major week-long trip, especially to something as logistically overwhelming as NYFW, two days later is really not something I thrive on. Frankly, I was a bit of a wreck even before I left because I didn't feel I had everything prepared to allow me to go away.
But the great thing is that I felt I learned a lot, made some connections, met even more new great people and will be in a 100% better position to do this again next season. Which I totally plan on doing.
There are a million posts out there about getting your creds and the process (StyleIT's are very helpful), I thought a newbie/out-of-towner's thoughts might help if you are considering giving it a try.
Registration: There is a fee for registering. I'm not sure if it varies but I paid $65. With all the work these folks go through, I'm not surprised. I applied using the online registration the day that it opened but didn't get my creds approval until just two weeks before the show. And, if you don't get approved, give them a call or email back. There have been human errors made so a polite question may help clear things up.
Shows: Once you get your approvals, you will also soon get a list of the designers showing in the tents. Start contacting them. I sent out an email to almost everyone one on the list. You will get some "sorry, no room" responses and some standing room approvals and possibly even some seat assignments. This could all change at the actual show. If there is one you want to go to and you don't have an assignment, try for standing room. It can't hurt. You are not going to get press ready images but that's okay. You are there for the experience. That said, be prepared to stand a lot but also don't think you have to see everything. Prioritize and don't exhaust yourself.
Events: There are a million other events going on around the city. Keep your eyes open. Ask around. When you connect with people see what they know about or are going to. Not everyone is showing in the main tents.
Planning your dates: NYFW goes for a full week. This year it was Thursday to Thursday. And if you go the whole week you are going to be near dead by Friday and through the weekend so be realistic with what you want to do and see and how much time you can take off, especially if you are from out of town like me, and how much you can afford to spend on travel, taxis, subway, food, etc. I wanted to get there on the day before so I could pick up my creds and get settled before the shows started on Thursday (oh, yeah and all the deals and events at Fashion's Night Out) but I also wanted to stay for the IFB Soiree on Monday night. That is probably my biggest regret for having to leave early. *sad face*
Planning your location: Because I booked so last minute and was trying to be very frugal, I ended up staying in the upper west side. The positives were the rate (sort of deal for NYC at this time of year) and that I was 2 blocks from the subway which had an express right to Time's Square. The negative, I was 50 blocks from the tents. I tried to limit myself to cabs at night when I was coming back late but it was pretty removed. For me it's Midtown all the way. I will book my hotel earlier next time and be prepared for the cost... unless I sleep on Wendy Brandes' floor with Henry and Gigi(it's going to happen someday Mr.B, so be prepared!).
Creds: I tried to get in around mid-day on Wednesday to get my creds and press bag voucher (there are limited numbers of these). By the time I got out of the airport, checked into my hotel and down there it was almost 4pm. In the end, this was better because I heard there were long lines early on with several hours wait. I waited about 5 min and got right in and out... I also got a press bag voucher so all was well.
The Tents: They are pretty much just that - big tents, filled with sponsoring companies booths and lots of people waiting for the next show to start. There are not a lot of places to sit inside. Be prepared to stand around for while and carry all your stuff. I had my purse, mini computer, camera bag, my flats, and by the end of the first day a very large bag of presents from Haute Look (more on that soon) which can weigh on you. Plus, when I left at the tents I could not get a cab and was about to cry because my back was killing me.
Clothes and Packing: This is where my organizational freak flag starts to fly. I made about 10 lists of what I was going to wear and pack and then I made lists of what bag I was packing them in. I have a problem, what do you want from me? The big issue, as I've said before, is that I don't like to check stuff, especially shoes and jewelry and make-up. So that means I have to carry on almost all shoes, computer, purse, the "good" camera and lenses, jewelry, and make-up. The other issue was the weather. I had tons of little outfits planned and then the weather switched to having lower temps and rain. In the end I did pretty well - I got all my clothes which were a good 14 outfits, toiletries, and a pair of shoes into a single pilot case. I wore my raincoat which I ended up needing and even had room to fit in some of the goodies I brought back.
But that leads me to a big learning about what to wear to these shows. Frankly, whatever you want. There were, of course, lots of girls in black dresses and killer shoes. Many of them looked liked they were falling out of the front of their shoes (ick!) and some people seemed pretty uncomfortable walking and standing around on the concrete and cobblestones by the end of the day. I wore heels but they were Aerosoles and fairly low.
Bring or wear flats if you can and, unless your ego depends on you getting photographed, don't worry about wearing something crazy or uncomfortable or designer. People are not going to throw tomatoes at you no matter what you wear. It's far better to look decent or professional and be able to walk at the end of the day than to wear shoes you can't stand up in. That said, it's still fun to people watch because the range of clothes is so great. You'll see really lovely outfits like these...
And the shows, well the shows are fun and crazy. Remember, you may have a camera, but you really don't want to be on the photographer riser.
Coverage: Why do you want to go to Fashion Week and what are you going to cover and say. I've seen a lot of complaining from some people about how if they didn't have a seat assigned it wasn't worth going in. Maybe I'm not jaded enough but I think that's kind of crazy and spoiled to say. Having a seat is great to be sure but I don't think most independent sites are going to get better images than the major pubs. It makes more sense to me to go, enjoy the experience and give a perspective. I know Style and Vogue and Elle are going to talk about the fabrics, the cuts, the influences. I planned on talking about my favorite pieces, the shoes and how I might adapt pieces into my life if I could.
These are some shots from the Ports 1961 show. I was lucky enough to get a seat at the show because this was PACKED!
The show itself was not very long but it was an interesting experience for me. Everyone was very respectful when it started and you could see the designs pretty well, even from my seat up top.
I'm sorry I'm missing more of the shows because I think the rest of the week will be great.
But the shows are only part of the experience. Then there are the parties and the people...
I was able to attend the Fashion 2.0 party put on by Yuliat Style Coalition on Wednesday night. It was filled with lovely people (hello, @skyle!).
Thursday was Fashion Night Out, which gets its own post and Friday night, right before my departure I had a fabulous time with Wendy and a ton of other lovely blogger ladies at the francis studio and then an amazing dinner.
I'm not even going to try and recap this becauseWendy and Jennine already did a much better job including amazing photos. Suffice it to say, however, I want a bunch of pieces from the Spring line.
I was so sad to go the next day that when I went to a party at my neighbor's that night I had to wear the flag dress from the francis Spring 2009 collection.
I've still got a ton to write related to this so more to follow....
